“Don’t get me any jewelry for our 50th anniversary.”

“Of course we can. It’d be my honor to help you with your 50th anniversary. We will be your event planners. I don’t want you worried about a thing.” My husband, Roger, looked at me while I talked with a dear friend, Carol. She was very nervous about hosting a celebration party, which she felt uncomfortable doing. Marty, her husband, felt strongly that this was an important date to recognize.

When I got off the phone, Roger said, “Can you take on another project? Both of us had experience in the food business. I’d worked as the VP of Operations for a large catering company. The largest sit-down dinner I managed was for 3,000 people; coordinating dinner for 30 wouldn’t be any trouble, but it requires time.

Roger was hooked after Marty called and asked if he could share his “marriage” toast to get feedback.  When Roger told me about it, I knew there wouldn’t be a dry eye in the house.

Parties require attention to detail, and I wanted to relieve my friend’s stress and assure her that everything would be fine. I was surprised to feel nervous on the morning of the event. We love these two friends, and I wanted everything to be perfect. They are more than friends—they are like family to us.

When we got to the restaurant, we found it not quite ready. Roger and I folded napkins, set up the drink table, dried some glasses, and placed the menu cards and the lovely party favors. Carol and Marty arrived just as everything was ready. They were delighted.

The guests loved seeing Marty and Carol’s wedding photos as they were welcomed in. Roger was assigned to be the MC and started by mentioning that only 5% of marriages last 50 years! Next, he invited the guests to share stories and congratulate the couple. The room resounded with love and laughter.

I couldn’t wait for Marty’s toast before dessert. Marty had given Roger a ring box, and I quietly delivered that to Marty as the dishes were being cleared.

His loving speech included Carol being a light wherever she goes, bringing joy to everyone. He was thankful for all these years and mentioned Carol told him, “Don’t get me any jewelry, or I’ll kill you.” So, he decided to say this in front of us so she wouldn’t act on this impulse.

He continued, “When you start a marriage, you want your spouse to mold to you, but what you discover is that you learn to mold to your spouse. I made this ring, consisting of a silver and gold band layered next to each other in a waveform representing how we have molded to each other.”

Marty and Carol are a true example of a love commitment, sharing their joys, sorrows, and challenges. We are blessed to be chosen as their friends.

Carol wrote me a note, saying they never had a wedding reception. They both felt this was their wedding.

Sometimes, no matter how busy we are, we should do the right thing and remember the important things we give our time to. Tears well in my heart, knowing how much this meant to them, something that was so easy for me and challenging for them. We all have gifts; sometimes, the best gift is just our time. Marty and Carol model 1 Corinthians 13, “Love never ends.” Their marriage reminds me that in giving, we receive so much in return.